Thursday, March 20, 2008

Holi Crap.

Time, around 6:30PM. Location: Mumbai Suburb ki galiyan.
People returning from their workplaces, thinking about the upcoming holidays.. rather "holi"days, ID, Easter etc.. People from different religions may come together or they may not but the festivals of those religions do come together.

I was lurking around on my bike.. err cycle.. on my daily stroll around the town.
Lurking in a hope to see good looking ladies. Holidays get more of those species on the streets.
And I was having a 'good' time.
Its almost natural to look at the terrace tops of the buildings as the holi day approaches. Yeah..for those dreaded water balloons. And the water inside them is by no means"mineral" water.
Even my urine is cleaner than that thing. **conditions apply.
Anyways, I was passing by some locality, a locality where there is the highest probability density of HAWT girls.

And suddenly * THAAAP*, and * AAAAAAAaa*
and before I could even think that I may have witnessed the first holi balloon victim, I found myself holding a florescent ball--the goldspot ball aka tennis ball--which is much widely used here to play cricket. And this was the "hard" types.

And across the street I could see a lady holding her right eye and sobing.
* Lady's' profile*(always important under any circumstance): short, married, moderate build..her voice..--on the basis of her 'AAAAaaa' and sobbing was sexy (No I am not a saddist). I didnt concentrate on her looks... man she got HIT!!

I approached her after some hesitation...and said "maam..sit down ..maam please sit down.."
but like every other girl whom I have ever approached to talk, she too didn't take any note of my existence. With me others followed, those office going guys.. the roadrunners, the shop lifters, the "where it itches...scratch" type of guys. And ofcourse some more ladies.
One of the ladies from a nearby dispensary literally took the hand off HER eye and doctored her.

And then the culprit, the one who had caused this turmoil arrived at the scene.. He was a teen.. an over grown teenager, no not fat.. some one who had joined the gym as soon as he was born...
He approached her and almost shouted on her.. "tumko laga kya?""paani chahiye kya?"
"vo ball tree ko lagke laga na?"

abee DKBOSE! Interview le raha hai kya!... Like it was the tree's fault!
Some 'uncle' was around scratching his things, eyeing those gathered ladies and gyaaning the overgrown kid... " itne jor se kyon khelte ho" 
And it was a scene..
The damage had been done.. I wondered if that lady cried not for the ball hitting her but thinking about what if that had been a balloon and she would have been the victim of "eye lost due to the impact of water balloon".. and she looked newly married.. the tensions are obvious.. "Bahu ki ek aankh nahi hai, beta tu ddosri shaadi karle" type of tensions.

*Irrelevant Note:: A police man spat on me while I was trying to overtake the police ki gaddi .. I called him an asshole.. and he smiled*

1 comment :

Anonymous said...

People should be using only safe things like Anda, water and Tamatar on Holi. But again Holi is the festival of colors. My ass!! Ek baar ankhon mein jaayega na dikhega colors ya baloons.
And the edited one-Police smiled when u called him an asshole. Well that reminded me of something. Cop called me a Monkey when I broke the signal but I waved and smiled at him..LOL!!

Post a Comment