Sunday, August 26, 2012

The Huggables

I (like most tharki guys) may have thought of and conjured up zillions of words to represent certain types of girls in general. Its mostly in the terms of how she looks or what that guy (me?) is doing to her in his mind..
Hawt Girl. Sexy Chick? Item!
'Saali kitni cute hai ye'
'Yeh toh malai hai malai'
'Yaar ye toh maal hai! Chaba jaun saali ko mein'
(Too dirty?)
Anyhow, you get the point.

But there is one 'section' of chicks who do not get enough mind-time that they deserve in the sleazy heads of the guys (like me). I shall hereby call them as The Huggables.
There are Fhakables.. Masturbatables. etc. (More on these sometime in future). But very often you come across a huggable. She treads on a very blur boundary of being sisterly and a cute chick. She is not someone you would think of even in your fantasy. She is someone who wears clothes more for comfort and less for them being 'in fashion'. She never ever dresses to attract guys. "How do I look?" does not belong to her vocab. But mind you she is well groomed. Kohl or kajal is probably the max amount of 'make up' she puts on her face. She ain't no nerd. Those homly leggings and a top that is usually a T-Shirt, which is a full sleeve T, with a color as dull as grey. No skin. No attempt is made to glorify her b00bage. But the T marks her curves, not sexily.. but 'cutely'.
This keeps her camouflaged very well amongst the crowd. 
But if you scan that crowd patiently. Screening out all those wannabe hoes and sluts, you may spot her. She is sometimes seen alone, with a book. Or accompanying a couple. The chick in that 'couple' has probably dragged this huggable out of her room to go for a movie or such.
If you are a guy, your pee pee may go 'WTF bhencho? Isko kya dekh raha hai" when you first see her.
But wait. Patience is everything when it comes to 'The Huggables'.
The short hair. That subtly coy demeanour. That reluctance of being 'there'. Its more about her personality and her 'aura'(?) that slowly gets you.
And then your mind  suddenly goes..
I JUST WANNA HUG YOU! HUG ME GOD DAMN IT! YOU ARE SO FREAKIN HUGGABLE.
Kuch na kar bas ek tight si long lasting, 6 mahine guarantee wali jhappi de de. ='(


End of Story.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Versus

Gola vs. Coca Cola
Cutting Chai vs. Vodka Shots
Nariyal Pani vs. Cocktail

Kanda Bhaji vs. Nuggets

Vada Pav vs. MacD Burger
(All pics are 'stolen' from google images, credits to virginal authors)























                                                                   
                    But it really was just  Me vs. Her.


Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Hazaron Khwaishein Aisi Waisi

Become a Dj.
Get a BJ.
Own a porn library. Soft porn only.
Make a professional HD porn movie.
Act in a porn movie.
Attain orgasm to an erotic video/story just by watching/reading it. No touchy touchy.
Get a BJ by a chick who is 17 years 11 months 29 days 23 hours and 59 minutes old.
Watch porn video with a chick, just to check out her expressions. Especially the "Eww" one.
Keep the loo door open while I poop when the house is filled with guests/relatives and scream "FREEDOM" at the top of my voice and shut the door immediately.
Organize an exclusive party/event (free booze, free food and all that) in a physics department where the hottest women in the town are invited to mingle with geeks while grooving to the music played live by one of the best DJs in the world. No outside guys allowed.
Steal a stud's GF.
Learn to sketch. Really well. So well that a hawt gal requests (begs?) to be sketched by me.
Pet atleast 3 cats and converse with them in meow language for atleast one hour.
Make multiple cat videos and upload them on youtube.
Change atleast 0.0001% about this world.
Flirt with a girl successfully in front of her BF where he cannot comprehend whats going on while she enjoys and even participates in the flirtations.
Make talking about science sexy instead of geeky/nerdy.
Forget some people, some things thoroughly.
Record a song (instrumental?)
Write short stories.
Write short erotic stories.

More disturbing khwaishein shall be jotted down in a future blogpost that will be titled:
'Hazaron khwaishein chi kaisi kaisi.'