Sunday, September 02, 2012

From being envious to being envied. (Not really)

Just when I thought I couldn't do any better in chick department other than ogling and mentally undressing them, my mind conjures up some unknown courage to do something different from this norm.
Here I am, who was still in midst of 'writing' a blog post on how short my life could turn out to be..
Being sh!t scared of how I may end up dead due to cancer. Every freakin moment filled with a weird kind of fear.
And then this happened.

Situation: Waiting room @ director's office of my institute.
People around: The 'peon' and a very sweet si rajasthani kudi.
So I enter the premises with a very weird look as usual. An old man's umbrella, age old trousers which was deteriorating, and a pair of chappals that would make any old man in his 80's proud.
And oh yea.. plastic ki thaili, ekdum typical.
All in all I was dressed to be killed. I could have replaced the peon. I was dressed more apt for that position.
Anyhoe. So as I entered the office, there was this girl. Pardon me. Sweet girl. *Blushes*
Okay Gay. -.-
She had everything that said: I am a high class, high end entity and I am not from this sh!tty institute of yours.
Which meant, mein usko dekhoonga bhi toh muzhe chatka lagega kind of a girl. She was a 'moderate' Xavier's college material. Studious but happening. Not those chotta chotta and phata phuta kapde vali.
At standard temperature and pressure, I wouldn't even be sitting besides her. I get repelled when an unknown hawt chick is in a close proximity. The thought that I may make her feel uncomfortable makes me uncomfortable. However ironic, its true.

Back to the situation. The director wasn't available in his office. So following my normal standard protocol, I left.
Then on my way out, this dude shows up, I ask for his time and he patronizingly asks me to wait.
As he walks in, this chick gets up.
[Detour: After watching a documentary on Discovery or Nat Geo, I don't remember which one was it, I have learned or mis-learned a thing about female pheromones. It said something like: If you sit near a girl, you 'catch' her pheromones, which makes you 'healthy'. If you sit on the same seat as she does, same effect. Very weird and creepy, but thats discovery channel, made by creeps and nerds, made for creeps and nerds.]
So following the pheromone-al exchange interaction, I went "Mmmm sweet pheromones" and leaped at that seat.
She sat besides me. DOUBLE PHEROMONES!
Standard norms dictate to shut up, and wait. Take out your cellphone and text random people to kill awkwardness and time.
This time however. I was like. Fhakh! What if my bio-clock is ticking faster than its supposed to be? Before I could process all such similar what ifs, I found myself conversing with her.

I remember travelling by a flight, watching a guy chatting up with a hawt chick(who is a stranger w.r.t him) for the total flight time. And not a one way talking, a thorough conversation. That envied me. How the freakity fhakh can he just 'Talk!?'
May be cause I was trained to talk more with computers in C++ and Python and less with people in English.
But here I was on a roll! So much so that the peon thought, that we two were 'bf-gf'.
Also it didn't end there. We even had a little snack together, walked together.. etc etc.
*Enters blush mode*
I am still digesting the strangeness (w.r.t me) of this situation.
Something similar was tried with another chick who happened to be my friend's friend.
I found my guy friends were envious of me for pulling such an endeavor off.
Though the driving force to all this was "Fhakh I may die soon. Fhakh everything, I am gonna live it off", which was sad.

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